Hi--with HIPPA laws, I wonder what kind of effect this could have, but is there any way you could contact your husband's diabetes doctor (I can't remember if he sees an endocrinologist or not) and tell them that you would like the doctor to have your husband consider doing a trial of a continuous glucose monitor? I've done 2 day trials in the past, and the results can be really eye opening. You could print out the results and then show your husband exactly where he is going low and exactly how it coincides with his behavior. If the doctor pooh-poohs the idea, explain exactly why you think it is needed (the family history with his daughters, your own experiences, etc.).
Also, I don't know where you are based, but some of the larger medical centers have therapists on site who have backgrounds in diabetes. Would it be worth contacting one to get coping tips for living with a noncompliant diabetic?(Maybe they'd do phone sessions if you're not local). I know you say it's not your disease, but it's like how Al-Anon is for relatives of alcoholics--it'd be to learn how to better deal with someone who has a particular disease.
We have insurance through separate companies, so I can only talk to my own insurance providors. If you read back through my blogs, you will see that I have been to diabetic counselors, nurses and nutritionists - educating myself as much as I can and coming up with a wide variety of ways to deal with life as a spouse of a non-compliant diabetic.
He does not see an endocrinologist - and I have asked him to do so on a number of occassions.
He would never consent to even a trial of a continuous glucose monitor. I have asked him in the past. We have done the manual testing with a grid and a scale comparing lows to moods. Under a nurse's supervision. It made him etremely angry. He knows the problem exists. He simply chosed to ignore it.
Interesting comparing being a spouse of a non-compliant diabetic to being the spouse of an alcoholic. I think we'd have to put that as an alcoholic on his last legs! My brother-in-law is an alcoholic and I would take that any day of the year over this. I know you are trying to be kind - maybe we could start a diabetics anonymous. I just don't see anyone attending.
In Alcoholics anonymous, the alcoholic admits they are an alcoholic. The apologize to others for what they have done to them. They attempt to quit drinking.
My husband is in total denial as to what diabetes is doing to him. He has never apologized to me for what he puts me through. And he's not about to quit this inch-by-inch suicide mission he is on. He ate a box of girl scout cookies 10 minutes ago.