Saturday, August 19, 2017

Diabetes - a death sentence

The last time I posted, we had just been to the nephrologist.  I wrote this:

Gave him 3-5 years before he will need dialysis.  That's interesting because only 2 years ago he was told that he needed dialysis then.  I think this just confirms to me that labs really can't forecast what you do and don't need as they can quickly change for the good or the bad.

Could I have been in any more denial?  I think it finally hit both of us that that's exactly what we did - we made up excuses to "prove" the doctor was wrong.

So what if he only has 3 - 5 more years before dialysis?  And what if he still doesn't want dialysis.   Is that a death sentence?

It sure makes you look at life a bit differently when there's a time frame put on what's left to it.

We have been talking a bit about what he might like to do, changes he would like to make, bucket list items to be done.  Right now he says he doesn't want to change a thing.  I'm fine with that.  As long as he keeps his emotions, anger, reactions, etc., under control.

So a few more things have happened.  The Nephrologist called and said that he had talked to the gastrointestologist  who will not see him until he has been off all marijuana for 3 months.  Because it could be the marijuana that is causing the nausea and vomiting.  He said he would not do that as he has no other means of pain management.  (which is true.)

I reminded him after 2 weeks that he needed to get his labs done.  He has decided that he's not going to get labs right now.

What on earth am I supposed to do?  Keep notes for one thing.  Keep this diary going so that I can go back and remember why he didn't do labs when he was supposed to do them.

I suppose it's a catch 22.  He's going to die.  Why keep doing anything  other than what makes you as comfortable as possible.  I am NOT happy with his use of marijuana....but we happen to live where it is legal and there is not much I can do about it.  I did tell him that I thought he should stop using it for the 3 months and see if it cures the vomiting.  At the moment - he'd rather put up with the vomiting.  I wonder what will happen when he rips his esophagus out?  I just shake my head.  He is such a brilliant man.....until it comes to something like this.

At least he told the nephrologist that he was using marijuana so that is finally in his medical record.  Mostly edibles.

The coughing continues.   About the same.  Dry hacking type cough.

Just got back from spending a 2nd 3-day visit with my sister who's husband has lung cancer.  He just started chemo via a pill.  Diarrhea which is "chemical waste" so she has to dress like a hazmat crew to clean it up while protecting herself.  There are some things much worse than diabetes.

DW