Friday, July 27, 2012

Ups and Downs, Highs and Lows

He has been in a complete snit.  Not speaking to me.  Using his "silent" treatment. And I've been ignoring it.  I think maybe he's upset because I'm spending so much time with my sisters....but not sure that's really it.

Then my mom got sick.  Had her in the ER and my sister's and I are rotating staying with her.  Going over 3-4 times a day to check in.

And he immediately turns into a saint.

Is it that the adrenaline kicks in and brings his glucose up?

Or does he somehow feel more "needed" because she is sick?

I feel so bad for her. She's been in incredible pain.  Called hospice to come in to control the pain and assist her in remaining independent as long as she possibly can be.  They can stay on board for 3 - 5 years.

Is he worried that he's going to need hospice?

Mom seems to want to will herself to death at times.

Is he thinking he can do that?

At least his snit is over!  And while I'm stressing out over mom, I'm getting a little relief from him.

As an update:

He's still eating everything in sight and I'm refusing to go to the grocery.

He's still have way too many lows - using power bars and glucose tabs way too much.

He is not sleeping at nights.  But will sit in his chair and sleep most of the day.

When life gets too overwhelming, my sisters and I get together and have a good talk.

His son cancelled the granddaughter's birthday gathering and I think hubby is quite depressed over that.

Working on staying in my happy spot. Gardening is so good for me!  And singing again - oh!  what a joy!!!


Sunday, July 22, 2012


All of my sisters and one of our female cousins were together this weekend along with an artist pal of mine.  The word "ignoramus" came up - it was a word we could use during our childhood days as we weren't allowed to curse.  If we didn't like someone, we would call them an "ignoramus".  I thought it meant idiot.  So, we looked it up.

It means:  A really ignorant person. Someone who doesn't know how the world works, and doesn't CARE to know.

and I had to laugh as it sort of describes hubby's attitude towards his diabetes.  He does not CARE to know what is going on in his body.

He is now buying 2 bottles of glucose tabs every week at the grocery store.  Along with 24 power bars.    In addition, this week he has eaten 2 10" cherry pies.  3 Snickers bars and who knows what else.

Obviously he's gaining weight again.   My friend said he looks like he's perpetually 7 months pregnant.

And he is refusing to go to any of his doctors.  No checkups.  No labs.  No A1c.

I know.....I can't fix him.