Saturday, June 25, 2011

What is up with the potato chips?????

Is this EVERY diabetics food drug of choice?  I was reading other posts/comments and it hit is my husband's drug.  He will sit and eat an entire LARGE bag at one time.

OK, if I ate a whole bag of potato chips - I would be vomiting!  We never have less than 3 or 4 bags in the pantry and I can't begin to tell you when the last time is that I had any.  If I do the shopping, I get pringles low fat.  He hates those!  So he will actually go to the store to buy chips and tell me I forgot to get them!  LOL!!!

It does not pay for me to shop "healthy".  If I buy fat free cream cheese, or low fat cheese, or skim milk....he will just go get what he wants.  I sometimes wish we lived an hour from a grocery, but I doubt that would change a thing.

Eating out is his all time fav thing to do.  I've written before about how he can't decide until the last minute what he wants for dinner.....and it doesn't matter how full the fridge's something that we don't have.

But potato chips.  That's a quandry for me.  Carbs.  Boost in glucose?  Salt?  Oh, he always wants the same kind, too.  Lays.  unflavored.  And he will just sit there and eat the entire bag.

Down to the crumbs.

Then he will fold the bag over the top and put it back up in the pantry.  Yes....even when there are only crumbs left.  One time, I conducted an experiment.  I didn't empty the bags out of the pantry and he just kept buying more.  We had 20 bags up there with only crumbs in them.  Men - idiots!  LOL!!!

So my pain has been much better today.  Now that I now this is coming from stress, I can tackle it head on.  Every morning I get up and turn my day over to God.  This morning I asked God to just take everything that was on my mind and hold it for me.  Maybe it will work. I had a good day.  I made cocktails of Aleve and tylenol.  Have one more that I can take.  Seem to help.  That and the heating pad. Oh, I have a heat massager - one of those thumper kinds - and I spent half an hour running it over muscles today. We'll see if that helps.  But I could get my legs in and out of the car and hadn't been able to do that in a couple of weeks.

I did tell him that he has to start doing more around here.....that we have to take some of the stress away from me.  So he went outside this morning and uncovered the awnings and got the sunbrella up.  Then he helped me get the pads on the chairs.  First time in 4 years that he's helped me get the back deck ready for summer.  And I was able to spray all the flower beds for weeds.  It's been a good day.  Yeah!!!

7:00 pm though and he's been in bed for half an hour.  I literally couldn't lay in bed that long - from 6:30 pm to 7 am???  Not me!

I'm thinking of going to my sister's tomorrow instead of Monday.  Get a head start on my time away.  I think I need it!  But before I leave, I'm going to tell him that I do not want to come home to a dirty house, dog-peed on carpets, etc.  He's going to have to take care of the place this week.  :o)


Thursday, June 23, 2011

Too much stress - what it can do to your body

Just something to think about.

Diseases caused by stress:
Skin disorders
Asthma triggers
Autoimmune Diseases
Hypertension and heart disease
Migraines and headaches

Constant stress can cause serious immune system dysfunction.

Home, children, overtime at work, finances, volunteering, husbands.

Death of a loved one, divorce,substance abuse, miserable jobs.

All promote the release of cortisol (our stress hormone)  which can cause destructive immune factors to be released.

Abnormal levels of these cortisols are associated with autoimmune conditions, inflammatory diseases and allergic conditions.

When cortisol counts go up, DHEA counts go down. DHEA is the immune and anti-aging hormone which helps repair and maintain tissues, reduce atherosclerosis, increase insulin production and balance, control allergic reactions, and balance the immune system.

Low levels of DHEA cause sexual dysfunction, muscular shrinkage, memory loss, degenerative disease and poor immune function.

Life with a non-complaint diabetic is 24/7 stress.

So how do we go about reducing stress?

1.  touch therapies and reflexology....relax the muscles, relaxes the circulatory system, sooths the nervous system.

2.  slow down.  take care of yourself.  eat healthy food.  take a daily multivitamin that includes high levels of B complex.

3.  learn relaxation techniques that suite your lifestyle and personality

4.  meditate (any activity that helps keep your attention calmly in the present moment)

5.  breathe.  Deep.  Slow. In. Out.

6.  self massage

7.  take a time out.  No wonder I love long hot baths.

8.  music. sing.  play the piano.  listen to soothing music.

9.  positive thinking.  30 seconds is enough to shift your heart's rhythm from stressed to relaxed

10.  love.  Love your pet.  Love your child. Love yourself.

So I have failed at this.  I have been under such intense stress for the last 3 years. First with his heart attack, then open heart surgery a year later, then the 2 spinal fusions surgeries a year after that (this past February)  21 days of him in the hospital with me fighting for his life, for his care, nearly 24 hours a day.  Then 3 months of intense home care.

And in that process, I did not take time to take care of me. Oh, I thought I was.  But I really wasn't.  My art wasn't enough.  My body started to attack itself.  I ignored every single symptom.  Until 2 weeks ago when I physically could not move.  I called my doctor and said I needed help.  Today, she did all kinds of xrays, lab work and she thinks that my immune system is attacking itself.  We are going to rule out as much as we can, but it seems apparent that my body has attacked my muscles, causing weakness and muscle pain.

We are starting physical therapy immediately and will be treating this with meds.  There is hope for a good prognosis, but if we don't "fix" me, I could well end up in a wheelchair - way too young!

All because I thought it was more important to take care of him than to listen to my own body.

Hrump!  I think things will be changing around here tomorrow! I have cleared my calendar for the next 10 days.  I am going to stay with one of my sister's next week and relax.  Completely and totally forget about everything and anything here.  Sort of a "cleansing" process so to speak.  I will be altering my diet, adding exercises and stretches, doing everything possible to nip this in the bud.

My body is screaming at me to slow down. I'm going to listen.


Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Another wife blogging.....

Tired wife and mom

She's started her blog and telling her story.  Wow....we are growing!!!  I can't tell you how wonderful it is to NOT be so alone in all of this.  Finally.  Together, in unison, we might yet make a difference in how therapists think....and give a voice of reality to what happens when a diabetic doesn't take care of themselves.

So, I will call her TWM (tired wife/mom).  I completely understand.  You are actually very brave to be able to tell him at such a young age that you will not watch him die.  And kudos to you for telling him that you will not allow your children to watch him die.  It takes strength to say something like that.  And while it's terribly hard to do, it's the right thing (in my opinion).

This past week, there has been a terrible fire where my brother lives.  It came within 2 miles of their home. Lots of dry timber in the area and at times, the flames were jumping 300 feet high and the winds were going 45 mph.  His kids are 9 and 11.  Nightmare city.  They packed and packed and moved stuff out to a friends place and the sheriff came and told them to get out and they waited and waited and watched.  Children should not have to experience that kind of fear at such a young age.  Then I got to thinking.  I was 12 years old when my grandma's house burnt to the ground on a farm in the midwest.  I cried for days.  Life was never quite the same because she moved to town in an apartment and all the cousins couldn't run on the farm and play together.  I remember seeing the pile of ashes and blackened timbers that I had been inside of just the day before.  I have been scared to death of fires ever since.

I think watching a parent die from the effects of diabetes would not be any less frightening.  And perhaps more so because it could last for years on end.  There is much of this that they can be protected from. But the yelling and screaming while in a one is immune from that.

Sunday was Father's Day.  My husband's children are grown and are from his previous marriage.  Neither one of them called him. Neither one came to visit.  My heart simply ached for him.  But I know why.  They honestly believe that they grew up in an abusive home.  They do not understand diabetes at all.  All they remember were all the times when he screamed and yelled at them, blamed them, threatened them.  And I'm pretty positive that he was in one of his sugar lows.  I've learned to deal with them.  But children don't learn and their mom was pretty oblivious to his diabetes back then.

They don't want the grandchildren to be around him.  I can guarantee you that he has never had an outburst around them. When we do get invited to attend an event, I make sure that his glucose is ok.  If it's not, we call off sick.  I almost always go with him and his behavior is perfect.  But his children remember.  They have not forgotten.  And yes, I have tried to explain to them that it was his diabetes.  But they have chosen not to forgive him.

So if you do have children, educate them.  Teach them that this is not normal behavior.  Let them know why lows and highs happen and what can be done to help the diabetic. Always have a safe place to go to.  And never hesitate to walk away if the situation gets that bad.

TWM, if you've read my blog, you know I'm not a therapist.  I just write about my own experiences and give my own suggestions. Take them as a grain of salt!  My husband is alive today because of many, many prayers said for him from all over the world.  Yet he still refuses to take care of himself.

Welcome to the group!

Nephrology called today. He was supposed to go have labs done on June 1.  Hopefully, he will do them tomorrow.  I'm so grateful they are staying on top of this.  :o)