Wednesday, August 09, 2006

I HATE being his maid!

But I've had 10 days of relative peace, so I won't complain too much just yet! I have a theory. I scheduled our appt with a counselor....and he is trying to prove that we do not need counseling. He is literally being a saint. He's said several times that he wants the marriage to work. The counselor has rescheduled the appt and is now 2 weeks from tomorrow. I'm not sure he can maintain this for another 2 weeks. Why?

Well, one look at his feet and I KNOW he is not doing well. Huge boils. Oozing mounds on his toes. He ate 2 apple pies from McDonald's at lunch yesterday and a bag of potato chips along with some Chips Ahoy cookies. That and the quarter pounder and french fries at lunch and a TV dinner last night. Shall I comment any more?

I see little tell-tale signs. He starts to blow up and stops himself. That's good. But how much longer can he "stop"? In the past 2 days, he has received 3 boxes in the mail. He opens them up, and leaves the boxes on the kitchen counter. I asked him last night if he was going to break them down? He said, "I will get to it when I get to it". They are still sitting there. I know the "you are my maid" syndrome is just around the corner and about to kick in. As I look around the family/kitchen area, I see 6 empty water bottles, 3 glasses, 2 diet coke cans, and an opened box of cookies...all right where he left them. Is he too tired to put a can in the trash? A glass in the sink? Or is it just a mood? Or the beginning of another huge, massive swing in emotions? Oh...I've seen this pattern before. He shuts down. Lets everything just set where he left it....stuff piles up...and I can't see through the mess.

We have 2 little chihuahuas. They are HIS dogs as I never had pets and do not really appreciate indoor pets....although I have come to absolutely adore these dogs. They are just too cute! He has never house-broke them. He puts down potty pads. Lately, he has been forgetting to change them...or he just ignores them. The dogs won't go on dirty pads, so yep, they have started having accidents. Sigh. Hubby was doing pretty good at cleaning up after then, then he went to visit his parents, left the dogs here for me to take care of and it's like the moment he got home...he made some unspoken decision that it's now my job to take care of them. I did it for 5 days....I can do it the rest of my life!

Unfortunately, I HAVE to clean it all up today as we have guests arriving tomorrow. I may be the one who can't make it 2 more weeks before we see the counselor! I really hate being his maid.


Lori Rode said...

I just found your blog and I love it. I'm so glad you have created a good space for yourself to deal with these issues.

About your earlier mention of fears that he's fudging his logbook, some modern meters won't allow you to do that. They keep track automatically. Some diabetes professionals just plug in the cable and download the data. I use a OneTouch UltraSmart, which is a meter plus a lot of tracking features.

My DH is also more out-of-control with his diabetes than I would like. I'm counting the minutes until you get to meet with the counselor!

Diabeteswife said...

LOL! I'm counting them too! I still need to do the midnight raid thing and find out what kind of meter he has! LOL! He's definitely doing his best to keep it from me!

Less than 2 weeks til counseling begins. seems like it's forever away.