Saturday, December 24, 2011

Christmas with his grandkids

Today is our only holiday celebration. His kids and grandkids were here.  I had let him order all their gifts online - he used Amazon and they came already wrapped.

Well, there were mistakes. The oldest granddaughter got 2 Wappydogs, so the youngest grabbed one for herself.  The 2nd wappy was supposed to be something else, so basically, the oldest only got one gift, while the other 2 got several.

And you could see the disappointment in her eyes.

I pulled hubby aside and handed him a $50 giftcard that I was going to mail to my son and told him he had to give it to her.

He did....and she was thrilled!!!

But it hit me that I think the problems with cognitive skills may have started, so I need to start writing these down as well.  I checked his online orders and he had ordered 2 of the same thing and none of the order. Yet he has proclaimed over and over all afternoon that the toy store messed up.

We had gone to the grocery store this morning to pick up last minute things for lunch.  We were at the checkout and he was behind me and I said, "do you want to go ahead of me and give her your card?" meaning the discount card for that store.  He started digging in his pockets and asked me if I had my car keys.  I asked him why he needed my keys.  He said to go get the car.  So I realized he thought I had said "car" not "card".  So I said, "No, I didn't say you want to give her your grocery card?"  and he just stood there and stared at me.  It did not register to him what I was saying at all.  So I said, "You know, for the discount on what we are buying today?"  and he still just stared at me.  I started to ask him for his wallet and he blinked and said, "Oh - my grocery card!!!"

Now, we have been doing this 2 - 3 times a week since his last surgery - it's become almost a daily thing this past month.  At first I thought it was just the hubub of so much going on, but now I'm starting to wonder.

I've read as much as I can find about neuropathy of the brain and what to expect.  This really is a new kind of stress.  And it seems to be the simplest things.  Trying not to have any frustration in my voice is so hard....but so far, I'm doing ok.

What I'm learning more and more is that this really is not easy. There is no text book to prepare you or even help you.  There are no guidelines.  No rules.  you just fumble your way through it the best you can....knowing that it is only going to get worse.

1 comment:

Lilly said...

So much of what you write here sounds like a typical day in our house. And it is very scary when you realize that they are just not comprehending, and you can't rely on them to successfully get a task done.

I have done ALL the Christmas shopping for many years, because of errors similar to what you describe with your hubby's online shopping. Thank GOD you had the gift card! This year, I asked my hubby to please help me with addressing Christmas cards. He managed to do all of 3, and didn't complete the address on the last one . . . luckily, I noticed this before I walked them out to the mailbox.

Take care, and may you continue to find ways to nurture yourself and maintain sanity for yourself in the coming new year.