Tuesday, February 17, 2009

"adjustable bed"

LOL! My how we have progressed as human beings. It's no longer a "hospital" bed - it's now an "adjustable" bed! A few months ago, I moved to the guest bedroom in order to sleep. The sofa just wasn't cutting it for me....and I couldn't sleep with him because of his restless leg syndrome and the fact he nearly bounced me out of bed at night.

But that didn't work as we have too much overnight company and he turned bedroom # 3 into a workout room (that never gets used) and everytime someone came to stay, I ended up in bed with him (no sleep) or on the sofa (back ache).

So I went looking for a single bed. Our bedroom is large enough that I could put a daybed in here. Browsing through craigslist, I saw an ad for an adjustable bed. Automatic. Serta mattress. Doesn't look like a hospital bed at all...but will raise and lower just like one. And only $200!!! So I bought it. Found bedding that makes it look like a daybed. It is perfect.

Problem resolved! He sleeps in the king bed and bounces all night long. I'm on the "daybed" in the corner of the room. Quiet, comfy, no bouncing! We are back in the same room and I think he is an ounce happier because of it.

When I first brought it home - he was a bit upset by it all. He said, "I hope you did not buy that for me - I am not going to sleep in it!" I said, "no, I have always thought I would like an adjustable bed for all the reading I do at night." He calmed down immediately and was content with it after that. And then I mentioned that mom might need it one of these days and I'd gladly give it to her when the time came. He was quite happy after that comment.

So, what is the stigma about a "hospital" bed that got his feathers in a ruffle? I mean, how fun to have a bed that you push a button and the head and feet will raise and lower for you? How cool to have a bed that you can adjust the positions to meet your needs? And when I told him that they retail for $1500.....well, then, and only then did he decide he was proud of my find!

Truth be told? You all KNOW I bought it with HIS future in mind!


Anonymous said...

The stigma about a "hospital" bed is that it is for invalids. Which, by your own comment, you fully expect him to be. His feathers were ruffled because bringing that bed into the house is saying "you're going to end up in this, or worse". Which is not necessarily a bad thing to say, even though you thought of a few other 'reasons' to have the bed.

Diabeteswife said...

You know, I really bought the bed for me. But I do hope it opens his eyes. :o)

Anonymous said...

I too am the wife of a diabetic. This morning he called me at work ranting about something that was out of my control. Thanks to your blog, I see that I am not alone. I have bookmarked you page and will visit it very often. What I wanted to tell you is I thought there was something wrong with me because I moved out of our bedroom too. I work and when we would go to bed, my husband would have to turn the radio on so loud I couldn't sleep. I hope you will keep your blog going as it has been good for me. We all need to know we are not alone. Thank you so much, Deborah

Anonymous said...

Since it's already May I hope it's not too late to correspond with you but I just found the blog and can't tell you how happy I am. I swear I never thought in my wildest dreams there would be a place on the net to talk to someone who would understand. So sorry for anyone else out there going through this, no-one could imagine the hurt you feel. My husband is a disabled VietNam veteran and as a result of Agent Orange he has Diabetes and PTSD. Try putting those two together and imagine the mood swings and memory losses he goes through. We have been married 41 years and he was the most gentle and loving man when he left for the war and came back so different, yet the same. There is really no way to explain it. For years I knew something was wrong yet none of this was recognized by the government so it became our problem. The diabetes was not found for years since I could not get him to get checked!! By the time Uncle Sam decided they had no choice but to own up to what they did to these poor veterans, he had already deemed me a villian and in his mind has made up a person that never existed and me the real person was long forgotten. I am now the ENEMY. The diabetes was full blown and totally out of control along with his weight.

Thank God his anger was always directed towards me not the kids and never physical, but, as much as I still love him sometimes I can't help but wonder if I was wrong for staying instead of trying to make a better life for the kids and myself. For the most part he is a good Dad and he is a great Grampy, but I sure gave up any chance of happiness in my life as far as marriage is concerned by staying to help him get through this knowing he would never again be the man I married. I know this sounds so selfish but out of 41 years we only had 3 good ones before all of this started. Believe me, by now I'm so passed over it there is no way of telling anyone and this is the very first time I've ever been able to tell anyone.

We go to the VA on a regular basis for him to get treated for PTSD and the Dr's comment on how do the wives put up with them? But we never get to talk to anyone about what we go through or get any help so just reading others stories has helped.

Thanks for letting me vent. Hopefully your still there and we will be able to talk some time.

Good luck to you and you husband.
Wishing you well.

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