Friday, February 15, 2008

Liar again

I've noticed the past several days that he is back to taking a 6 pm shot. So tonight when he went upstairs to take it before dinner, I asked him when he changed back to 3 shots? He said, "I never quit."

Thinking how he often twists the questions I ask to give me the answer he wants, I said, "you said awhile back that you were quitting the 6 pm shot."

He said no, that he has always taken 3 shots a day.

So I found my blog where I noted he was changing to 2 shots a day:

"Creatinine level"

And I swear that he did quit the 6 pm shot...in fact I know he did.

So why lie? Did he really forget that he quit taking them? Can he not remember telling me he quit taking them? Maybe he quit for just a few days....but I seriously think it was more than a few weeks.

Either he lied back then or he is lying now.

Just makes me want to say "I don't care...do what you want with your life".

Problem is that when he goes on dialysis, if I'm still married to him, I will be the one taking care of him. And I honestly do care what he does because it has a huge impact on the quality of our life together.

Sigh. Maybe I should take up boxing so I'd have something to punch!!! OK, just kidding..I'm way too old for boxing!

5 comments:

M said...

Hi,
I have dealt with the lying for over 10 years. I wonder, now, if it is an associated symptom of the disease? I used to think that I was losing my mind because of it but now realize that it is his BS levels that bring on this behavior.
Mary

Diabeteswife said...

Today, he accused me of knocking over a little mechanical robot and breaking it. I told him I had not touched the thing...although he had put it on my desk to get it out of the way. He called me a liar.

So I'm wondering if a person lies all the time....does that make them think they are being honest and the other person is the liar? Interesting.

What's important is that I know I did not touch the robot, much less knock it over. So I'm fine. I just wonder where this is going to lead...and if I will survive it or not.

M said...

Hi,
Your quote:
"So I'm wondering if a person lies all the time....does that make them think they are being honest and the other person is the liar? Interesting."

I have thought this very thing so many times over the years.

I really don't have anyone to talk to about this so I hope you don't mind me writing on your comments.

Each day is the same behavior but a different scenario. Today, for instance, he has gotten his mom involved by insinuating to her that I am not taking care of him. Now my MIL is upset with me because she thinks I am giving him sugary drinks. To top it all off she wants to move in with us so she can take care of him. I flat out told him if he needed his mommy to take care of him that he would have to move into one of her spare bedrooms. That remark from me ended the whole ordeal with both of them. His mom is 75 years old (her husband, who is also a diabetic, is 78, and my husband is 45. There is no way I can take care of all three of them plus my teenager and his drama and take care of my own health needs.

I have been humming the songs "Respect" by Aretha Franklin and "I Will Survive" by Gloria Gaynor in my head all day. I try to keep my emotional strength up even though physically I am not doing so good. I have been very sick with the flu the past two weeks and dh has been sick with his flu for 5 weeks. His immune system is down and I am very worried about him.
Mary

Diabeteswife said...

Mary, feel free to post here, or email me offline. Of course, I rarely check my emails..but I will be sure to do so in the next couple of days.

I am down with pneumonia right now and not enjoying anything at all. Sigh.

These are grown men. Why do they need anyone to take care of them? Did you hook up an IV and are force feeding him sugary drinks? LOLOL! I would say that to the MIL if it were me. You can't force a 45 year old to do anything at all....he does it all on his own.

For his mom to even say she is going to move in....well...what is wrong with her??? And no, you cannot take care of 3 other people and there is no reason why you should have too. The one thing I am learning in all of this is to take care of me. Obviously I messed up as I've got pneumonia now. So this week is total bed rest for me and you know what, it's not so bad!

M said...

Hi,
Hope you get to feeling better soon.
Mary