There's a new comment on the 9/30 blog from the widow of a non-compliant diabetic. In answer to your questions, yes, I've done the research:
75% of those who go on dialysis after the age of 50 live 5 years or less. 25% will live longer than 5 years, but the stats drop significantly. Most of them die from a heart attack.....from damage caused to the nerve endings in the heart.
So I do think I'm being quite realistic about all of this. I'm trying to enjoy the time we have left.
Your comment is quite timely as we had just been out to dinner tonight. I hope it was the lighting in the restaurant, but I looked at him and was just floored by how "old" and weak he looked. I know the foot surgery has zapped him of his energy, but I couldn't help wondering how long we have left.
At the same time, I cannot begin to think about the "what if's" his demise would bring. I don't know how you managed to get through it. I can't worry about that now..I have to worry about just getting through today with him.
His foot is giving him substantial pain and he is knocking back the pain pills at a rate greater than I am comfortable with. With his low kidney function, it just cannot be good. Fortunatley, he goes to see the surgeon on Monday.
Here's to all of us spouses of non-compliant diabetics. May you have a peaceful weekend. You deserve it!
DW
Friday, October 12, 2007
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2 comments:
I'm so glad you pointed out the post on the 9/30 blog. When Anonymous spoke of not letting others in so they wouldn't see how "ridiculous" her spouse was, it could have been me talking.
Although I am slowly getting better about opening up to people, there are still very few people who know the extent of my husband's noncompliance. It's total, and whenever I admit that, I have a momentary rush of embarrassment. I'm embarrassed because he sends a message that I'm not worth living for, and I'm embarrassed to admit I am married to such an idiot. He has become the definition of ridiculous.
Seriously, I cannot believe the crap I (and the rest of us) put up with. Some days I think I cannot take it for one more minute, but then I get up the next day and do it all over again. Good Lord.
My husband was placed on insulin 1 mos ago. He was on many diabetic pills prior to. He will not do the injections - I have to. We have been told that within 1 yr or so he will need dialysis. this is a huge nightmare for me. I am so scared. He is angry and depressed much of the time. All I can do is take this one day at a time. I am 62 yrs old and very active, but since his diabetes has worsened I am totally overwhelmed with administering meds, insulin, 3 well thought out meals per day. Anyone who can share with me - it would be much appreciated.
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